had another one of those days. they are few and far between and I am thankful for that. If I had to feel this way everyday I don't think I would make it. The day was bad, but nothing unmanageable. But at some point something broke, dont know what caused it at all and that scares me. When it went downhill it was all I could do not to break down and cry. Days like today are days when I feel broken, where everything hurts to the point that its hard to breath. I would rather have every bone in my body broken and that pain over this kind of pain. I shouldn't feel this way ever, there is no real reason for it, but I do.
It's that feeling you get when you have had your heart broken, had someone close to you die, and lost everything you have all wrapped up into one. I hate feeling this bad about myself, it makes me feel worthless and for someone like me that is the worst thing ever.
I dont have to have someone watching over me to make me feel like I'm not doing my best, I am my own worst critic. years of being told that I was never good enough at something, that I would never finish something I started, that I was never pretty enough have worn me down. I think for everyday I do get to feel good this one day takes it all away.
It sucks to have one day drain the life out of you.
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